Title : Yesterday, today, tomorrow, next week.....................
link : Yesterday, today, tomorrow, next week.....................
Yesterday, today, tomorrow, next week.....................
Quite a strange feeling, in my 'previous life' I was running from one deadline to another. Often no time for breakfast and lunch, which I tended to consume in the car on my way to a meeting. When I look back on the last 18 years in Spain alone, I just see me 'running'. Never stopped to think, just 'did' and worked.This makes the last week even more special.
I rented an apartment via Airbnb in Varel ( the middle of nowhere), where Uwe Stein lives, ( the man I am seeing / talking to here every day). The owners of this property ( who live in the same house) have turned out to be true angels. Inge the landlady could not do more for me. It has been raining a lot and she had insisted on driving me to see Uwe. She has taken me to the local supermarket to go shopping and is simply one of the nicest people I have met.
I have rented myself a bike, as I am not allowed to drive yet. ( really stuck here, cant drive and cant fly). The countryside here is beautiful, I love it. It is flat as a pancake, which is ideal for cycling, although I have not worked out, why regardless of my direction, I tend to always cycle in headwind.
It is fantastic to see though, that my lungs and the staples in my lungs clearly seem to be holding. I can cycle and am cycling 15 km every day. I can even sneeze again without too much pain, so things are moving in the the right direction.
I have spoken to my 'Lung Professor' , who has received the results following the pathology report.
I did NOT have Lung cancer, but metastasis from my breast cancer. This is good news on the one hand, as my body is not producing new cancers. The bad news however, something I need to now work on digesting without getting angry is that, it appears that surgeon number one, who removed my breast cancer tumor, did not do the best job. Well, I knew that, hence the second cancer under my armpit in my lymph node a year ago, but now this as well. The man should be struck off, but I have other things to concentrate on right now. What also made this a lot worse is the fact that the CT scan, which I can a year ago to the week, which mentioned 'something on my lung' ( to keep an eye on), actually are likely to have misdiagnosed, it was cancer a year ago. A 2 cm tumor does not grow in 10 month from nothing. They should have picked this up a year ago, then maybe the most recent operation would have been much simpler. ( I am still in pain. It is not only the scar, but my entire side, under the arm, the breast and my side, due to the 'digging' the Professor had to do, to find the third larger 'hidden' tumor. Although, everything happens for a reason , if the Spanish had been efficient and picked it up, I would have been naive enough to have it cut out from surgeon number two, who removed the tumor in my lymph node or would have had to find another surgeon via google in Spain.
I am so happy to be under the care of two German Professors and part of me wishes I had done this from day one, although the downside would have been me probably agreeing to chemo, as I would not have known any better then.
So now that I know that this cancer in my lung, has been removed, the 'Lung Professor' has asked me to get in touch with the 'Breast Professor', to discuss 'treatment' of the cancer I still have in my Lymph node. I will do that, but am not open to discussing treatment, as I know what that means. Radio and Chemo, neither of which I will ever agree to. I just want him to cut it out. Whether or not he will agree to that I don't know yet. I know that he wants to try and shrink the tumor first and then cut, but I am not going to do that. I will only return to Berlin if he agrees to cut it out. Hopefully I will talk to him over the next few days. I am not keen on the idea of having a fourth operation within 2 years, surely that would be a record?!, but prefer it to be cut of course.
In the meantime I am living in a wonderful 'bubble' here. I have not watched any TV, read no news, am totally out of work and the business and for the first time in my life, I am spending time on my own, reflecting and learning. I am really loving it, which I had not expected. I enjoy exploring the countryside on my bike here. I talk to the family most days and keep them updated, they are my 'link to the outside world'. I am sad to say that I missed Aiyala's first solo steps, but have this to look forward to when I eventually return to Spain.
I have so much reading to do which also involves some kind of 'homework'. I laugh at myself, as it reminds me of school. I hated homework then and I am not keen now.
Some other fantastic news, ( I cried some happy tears), Jan's wife Gema is pregnant! I am absolutely convinced that this is Jan ( her dead son) 'coming back' , regardless of whether it will be in a female or male body. Jan told me that a month ago, when Gema went to the cemetery, she felt as if 'something / someone' was stroking her tummy gently, but disregarded it at the time. She experienced this standing in front of her son's grave. She has found out this week, that she is 4 weeks pregnant. Strange, right? I am so happy for them, as one life left a new one is starting...............
Thus Article Yesterday, today, tomorrow, next week.....................
That's an article Yesterday, today, tomorrow, next week..................... This time, hopefully can give benefits to all of you. well, see you in posting other articles.
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